"He's ALREADY blessing me."
Already. Already? When pastor said these words on Sunday, I had both reactions. I know God's love is all around and has insulated me up to this present moment but, what about going forward? The next part of my life has EXTREMELY high stakes and I wonder if one has a finite grace expenditure. Is God concerned with achieving the proper balance of blessings or, does grace stretch as far as faith will allow? Hmmm...
I was pretty popular in high school. I can't deny it. Charm stretched through college and onto my years in Europe. New York brought new levels of blessing and fortune. Don't hate me, the road certainly got rougher...
The last 5 years have been harder than the first 25. From money, to career, to health, challenges were a-plenty. From what I hear, no one is born charmed, lives charmed AND dies charmed. Ask Paris Hilton, Michael Jackson, and the likes. Into every life, a little rain must fall... Cue monsoon and hurricane. I won't bore you with the endless parade of nightmare moments I have endured over the past half decade but believe me, its wince-worthy.
So the question is, can I expect the next season in my life to be magical because the last five years, well... sucked? I know God's promise is real but I don't know if he works on the barter system. "I'll trade you a week's depression if you will evaporate these last five pounds!" Cut to me both depressed and ten pounds overweight. No fair!!!!!
So, let me get this straight... I should be of the thinking that I am already blessed in my moments of infirmity and weakness? Then I can look at everything as a blessing... hold it a second, Butch, I'm definitely not there yet. But I am praying on it...
As always cover and flank me with your prayers and rest assured I am doing the same for you, even if my day.. well, sucks.
Scooby
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